Saturday, July 30, 2011

Survival of the fittest...or not so much!

Well, I am happy to say, I survived another round of summer school. 5 pounds, disgruntled people who had to be around me, no sleep, a face that looks like I went to combat and lost, and 1 massage later, I would like to say it was a piece of cake, but I just ate one, and well let me assure you, it was anything but.

8 weeks ago, or so, I informed you all I would be harping on another grueling round of summer classes. I also was super nervous because 3 of the 4 were senior level courses, but Stats cut me no slack, either. The Associate Dean of the Business school personally emailed me a week before classes began, asking me to unload one or two of my courses...that I was carrying too "tough" of a workload for a summer semester. I assured her 4 senior level classes was not only do-able, but I would pass with flying colors. (No, I didn't word it like that, but you get the point) So, with a week to torment myself on if I'm doing the right thing, I start reading the books. Forget break, forget life, all I'm worried about is I have to face this woman if for some god-foresaken reason I fail one (or more) of these courses. If you know me, I would rather someone pluck my hair out one-at-a-time than swallow my pride and admit I was wrong.

Anyway, fast-forward until tonight, when I have taken my last final, and pretty confident I have not only passed every class, but have made B+ or better in each of the 4 classes. No, I am not bragging. In fact, I am pretty upset I didn't clutch all 4 A's, but at some point I have to let it go.

If you're wondering why I am blogging about finals when this should be second nature to me by now...it's because this is my last summer in college, and I am starting to feel like I have accomplished something alot of people have a fear of, or don't have the opportunity to do. I had to prepare and deliver a 30 minute presentation this semester. Look, I can talk all day about a whole lot of nothing, but ask me to tell it to a class of people glaring at me and I crumble like a cookie...instantly. I fretted for about 6 of the 8 weeks until I realized I have to suck it up and do what I gotta do to get it done (thanks, Brooke). I felt like the elephant in the room had to perform a solo act. I not only sucked it up, but we went 40 minutes strong! I'm stared at everywhere I go, so why be nervous about speaking? Because there is a sense of self-consciousness with people of physical differences that will never go away, regardless if you get to hide behind the podium or if you're on the soccer field. But, when you are able to get past the point of nervousness, it's a wonderful feeling because you aren't sure if they are interested in what you are say or just why the hell you only have 2 fingers?!?!? It's quite magical. I assure you if you ever encounter someone with a physical difference of any kind, if you listen to what they say rather than why they are the way they are, you will walk away a much more knowledgable person!

I hope to expand on this topic and many more that have come up within the past week from a few of my blogger friends in the next week, but for now, I am enjoying a great big bowl of cake and ice cream!

Love to All,

Brianna

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